"Strike!", I Mean "Bullseye!" - OW!

In baseball, it is "Three Strikes and You're Out", but in bowling, three strikes makes a "turkey". 

Are you also a "turkey" if you shoot yourself in the leg WHILE bowling... actually bowling.

This idiot is definitely a turkey...

"Florida Man Shoots Himself While Bowling"

And has anyone noticed how many times "Florida Man" shows up in the news?  That guy is really unlucky.

A Little Rat Poison? Say when...

Many times idiots only hurt themselves, or maybe one or two people close to them.  If nobody gets hurt it can be really, really funny.  This isn't funny, but he is still an idiot.

Pesticide Poisoning In China Leaves One Dead,
Several Injured After Chef Mistakes Chemical For Sauce

I have no idea if they just use generic packaging or what.  Maybe the Chinese character for "Rat Poison" resembles the Chinese character for "Ginger Soy Sauce" or something.  Regardless, this is both sad and stupid. 

Do you ever wonder if they keep the ant poison next to the tubes of pesto paste in your local restaurant?

Oh, what a f"eel"ing! Man Puts Eel in His Posterior

Wow... one for the books.  "Eel Removed From Man After Getting Stuck, Chewing Through Colon (GRAPHIC PHOTOS)"

Words cannot describe.  I was honestly speechless... until I realized this couldn't possible be the first time (I mean, with 6 billion people, what are the odds?!?!?)   And sure enough...

• Eel Removed From Man's Bottom In New Zealand
• Man Reportedly Dies After Eel Is Inserted In His Rectum

And remember, definitely do not look for "eel in the ass" videos on Google with SafeSearch off.  

Just saying.

Care for Some AIDS with that Root Canal?

This one isn't funny. I always want to keep my eyes closed at the dentist, but not sure that's so wise after reading about this alleged idiot from Oklahoma.

7000 dental patients potentially exposed to HIV, Hepatitis, and other infections in the Tulsa area.

As if going to the dentist wasn't scary enough, we have idiots like this walking the face of the earth!